Thriving as an old school in the age of millennial definition and world is terrible. Especially when you get offboarded with all the new lingos and completely blown away by how relationships and their perspective have changed so much over the period of time.
I belong to a generation where love was presumed to be the epitome of compassion, reverence, persistence and patience. A promise to never give up on each, despite the differences and the imperfections, something which most of us when found, considered to be our ‘forever. However, things got a little upgrade in the last decade with the advent of dating and socializing apps changing the definitions of relationships tremendously and the changes are never-ending.
We as a generation have become so overtly cautious or maybe pretentious that we are afraid to even to utter the word ‘love’ and prefer resorting to terms like- hook up, constants, open relationships, friends with benefits etc., when it comes to describe a person we are seeing around, depending on the time length of hanging around them. The emotions inside us has taken a complete back seat and we are on the wheels of hormones, driving and running as fast as we can. Our entire world of forever has shrinked in terms of just a left or a right swipe. That is the value we render a person based on the ‘Bio’ and ‘Looks’. In short, inside us, we are actually rating and judging every person we see or meet. So where is the emotional string? Or are we just getting mechanical when it comes to intimacy just because it is easily available?
In the end,we are all a victim of minimum gratitude and very little patience. Thriving in the age of instant gratification, where the journey from the Tinder DM’s to bedroom is of just few days or maybe hours, forbearance is definitely too much to ask for. Since the best things in life takes endurance and persistence, hence we are interested only to invest mentally and physically but not emotionally. Times where IQ matters more than EQ and one is judged on the basis worldly matters.
No, I am not trying to tell that money doesn’t matter nor am I judging the hook up generation, however in pursuit of it we all tend to blur the image of the greater reality, the bigger picture. Life is long, like a cold never ending night, and everyone is busy stocking up woods for the fireplace to keep the cold bones warm till until the strength of gathering them wrecks. But when the phase of wood stocking is over, and you are left with more than required wood with no one to share the warmth over a cup of tea, what next?
Time escapes like the sands between the fingers and so does the experiences that gives us these little moments of joy in this eloping time. Experience that comes along with the ones you love, the ones you feel like holding on to, without the fear of passing time. In your lows and in your highs, you know you have people to support you, cheer you is more than anything anyone can ask for. Hence, I crave for happiness which is not ephemeral. And trust me all that money can buy is sporadic, what remains beyond is still far the reach of any wealth. You can have all the money and still cannot save the one you love the most. You can have all the riches, yet no one to love you with all their heart. Best wines but no company. So look beyond temporary happiness and value emotions and people. Life is much bigger than what you just see today and no one knows, how this journey will end.
This post is written by Moumita Ghosh. Follow The Mood Recipes for more blog posts and articles.
What a great read! I can’t even imagine what the dating scene looks like these days… I feel that everything is disposable even relationships.
Thank you so much Fran..for taking out some time to go through my blogpost and glad that you loved it. Yes, dating scenes are quite dire these days unfortunately.
I totally agree with you because i also belong from the same generation where love is respected and valued, but the reverse is the case, real love is gone, is all about self interest and what to gain.
Thank you so much Daniels for taking out some time to go through my blogpost happy that you can resonate with it.
I never could understand people who choose to just hook up and hook up over finding love. So happy to read this piece.
Thank you so much Kenny..for taking out some time to go through my post. I am happy too that you found it relatable as well.
I’m an old school, hopeless romantic ever since. Even in my early 20’s, casual hook-ups were never my thing.
Same here… hence feel out of place most of the times :(
Tried the hookup scene. First time, I ended up dating the guy for 8.5 years, then the second time, tried Tinder. The first guy I met on there, dated him and moved in together after 3 months and been together for almost two years now, still makes me feel like a queen and I’m grateful everyday for him. So many people are turned off with the idea, but it’s amazing what other experiences come from it!
Lucky you <3 touchwood Sending more love and good vibes <3 <3
I totally agree with you here. The dating scene nowadays is insane and much harder.
Thank you so much Nelly for going through my post and happy that you liked it. Yes the dating scenes are insane and relationships more complicated
So well written, I can’t even imagine trying to have a meaningful relationship in the age of online dating.
Thank you so much Patricia for reading and liking the piece. I try to write from heart and such comments from readers are always a delight and inspiration.
Great read! I totally agree – now with the impatience on any level, it is soo hard to find a real love.
Thank you so much for liking the post. Yes, true love is hard to find and never let go once you find one :)
i agree.. Im an old fashion too when it comes to relationship.. seeing how relationship works today – I no longer know if there is love in it
Don’t be disappointed, despite everything, I still believe true love exists! It just may time but it will definitely find you. Like they say, what you seek is seeking you. Sending love and good vibes <3
Hearing how relationships are today, I truly feel bad for the people of younger generations. I did meet my husband on a dating site, however we wrote novel length emails back and forth before meeting in person a week later, and had an instant connection. We just celebrated our 9 year wedding anniversary earlier this month and are more in love now than we were back then. We just keep growing stronger. It is sad to think that younger generations may never have that experience due to how drastically dating and relationships have shifted.
Wow 9 yrs. Couples like you are an inspiration to many. May your love outgrows time and beyond.
Sending love for both of you <3
Preach when you said that no to temporary happiness. Man, hope all kids nowadays truly understand that.
Thank you so much for going through my post. I hope they do and I hope more parents teach their kid that life is far more than temporary happiness
Its the age of instant gratification. No one wants to put efforts in relationships, work, pleasure or anything. A good read.
Thank you so much Bindu for going through my post and I am glad that you liked it :) Most of us don’t want to put effort in anything we do these days. Everything is done in a dilettante way unfortunately
I enjoyed reading your blog. Couldn’t really relate much but I think that this hook up generation happens because self love is taking over it. ?
I definitely enjoyed the read. I can only completely agree with you vision of love, it totally echoes with my own
It makes me sad that relationship nowadays is taken for granted. How I wish we can bring back time where courting is takes time and effort.
Couldn’t agree more with you about the points that you’ve mentioned! Today’s relationship are not based on sacrifices or accepting the flaws of others person. Everything has become so materialistic these days!
I’ve been out of the dating scene for almost 20 years so this is like reading about a whole new world out there!
I have a lot of friends who met their love ones over the internet. Some works, some don’ts. I thinks it’s a matter of how we handle the relationship. As long we respect each other.
I wish we can bring back the old times. Where dating is not that simple. I still choose a traditional dating, I mean without the use of an apps.
Very much agree with this. I’m just glad I’m out of the horrible dating scene. We’re really hurting ourselves a lot, especially as women.
Thoroughly enjoyed reading your post. You’ve put into words exactly how I see relationships in the young generation. I’ve been married for 36 years and it’s been an investment in the emotion front too.. forgiveness, patience and tolerance along with love.