“Do you need to ask, for what you need (in a relationship) be it sex, romance, gifts or anything”

If you are in my friend list, I have bugged you with this question, and thank you all for responding. Love you all for the participation.

Just to break the question down, do the partner needs to ask whatever they want, or is it that the partner needs to understand what all they need?

Responding to this question,

Pratiksha said:

You should always ask… depends on how you are asking though… asking directly is not required all time but u should be sure of the other persons mental state before getting into anything be it sex romance anything!

Moumita Ghosh said:

Not really, If the partner has to keep on asking for everything without the co-partner understanding, then there is no point of being together because the special moments can’t be created in a relationship if your partner has already demanded for it. [excluding some other real examples]

Faiz said:

Not always. Kabhi kabhi(sometime) it’s ok. And sex is not something I ask. I grab it my way.

Moumita Bhattacharya said:

My partner should understand,
There should be an unseen communicator in-between both of us
Or else chemistry doesn’t stay.

Riya said:

Sometimes u do. When the partner is not understanding your need
Or you are feeling that the partner is ignoring or busy in something
you need to ask…

Swathi said:

We shouldn’t ask for anything in a relationship. Everything has to come automatically out of love.

Amrita said:

Yes, sometimes I do need to ask
The partner is not God, hence need to communicate however with aged relationship the partner get to understand many things.

I am not writing down all the responses individually because it will make it a lengthy one, which we all hate equally.

So, let’s dig deeper and let’s analyze the situation here.

When we get in a relationship, there are many unsaid rules and expectations, which comes with it automatically, without asking for it. Every human being is different, and everyone has their own needs and expectations.

Ohh I forgot to put what I think about this question.
I don’t mind asking, whatever I need or expect from the partner or friends, whatever I need. I think that it is not possible for a single human being, to completely understand what the other wants all the time. May be several times but understanding a person all the time and every time, is not possible for me. On the other hand, if my partner completely understands, whatever I want, that will be like hitting a jackpot.

Here are some of the examples:

you buy her a gift, give her chocolates, and take her on a date night, in return she must have sex with you, right?

If she cooks something special, or in case guests are here, you are bound to help with the dishes, right?

When she comes back from office, and you give her a back massage, in return she needs to give you a massage right?

Am I sounding too prude?

Just wanted to ask you all, why is it so hard to speak your heart and mind out? [not just secret codes and some weird signals]

If you think you have the right to complain after wards after the partner is not able to read your mind, just remember you are the one with expectations, so you must deal with the upcoming tension and you will be the one getting hurt. I am not saying that you wouldn’t get what you expect from your partner, but you will get hurt, and it will hurt your cause. However, it’s your life, and you will be the better person to judge it and rule it.

It is very important, that while we are busy with expectations and reactions, we do not let our ego come in between. You can read the complete post regarding ego here.

However, I understand that human being is different, and everyone has their own passion and different ways of expressing ways of expressing love. It takes time, practice and a trial and error to get at the point where you can have some unsaid expectations with your partner.

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